


you're the broken part of me that keeps me whole

by manchestereye (orphan_account)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Additional Warnings Apply, Depression, Gen, High School, Mental Health Issues, Not youtubers, Teenagers, venting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-07-12 17:08:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19949815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/manchestereye
Summary: when school gets out for the summer, dan slips into a depression. phil stops by to check up on him, and dan's grateful for thator, i vent thru writing bc i can





	you're the broken part of me that keeps me whole

**Author's Note:**

> title from nothing would be better by nick jonas
> 
> also trigger: it mentions suicide and self harm but ao3 doesn't have those warnings

dan knew this would happen once school got out.

he wouldn't leave the house, and he would try to distract himself with youtube videos until his phone inevitably died and he didn't want to put in the effort to go find the charger and plug it in. he would go on his macbook and ignore all of the emails and messages he got from friends wondering what happened to him. well, there weren't that many to ignore because he tries not to make close friends knowing he would just hurt them in the end, but there are acquaintances that he doesn't really have the energy for.

he stopped taking his medication a week ago, because he felt that it was pointless in doing so. dan's parents weren't home for them to check anyways.

it's been routine during the summer that he would often spiral like this, and once he got back to school the life in his eyes would slowly return. his mental health was easier to manage during the school year, because dan could make himself busy and he would often study at the library to prevent him from laying around in bed all day. but he doesn't have that in the summer, because he doesn't have the motivation to even do summer classes.

he feels numb. nothing is really helping anymore. in the past, he would often try to attempt or to hurt himself because he still felt sad. it's different now. he feels like attempting wouldn't make him feel anything.

there's a knock on his door, and when he peeps through the door viewer, he sees that it's phil lester.

phil lester is the cute boy from next door that's in his grade. they've shared countless classes together, and if dan wasn't so emotionally closed off, he would possibly consider phil as his best friend.

dan opens the door for phil, and he smiles once he sees that it's dan.

"hi. i wanted to see how you were doing." phil says.

"i'm okay i guess." it's not too far from the truth. with a mindset where you can't really feel anything, everything just seems okay.

phil doesn't push anymore on that, and just asks if dan would like to come over to play a game or watch tv with him.

"whatever you're comfortable with." phil says.

dan takes phil up on his offer, and it soon becomes a regular occurrence.

dan doesn't really feel numb anymore, and maybe it's wrong to think that phil "saved" him, but if it wasn't for phil he probably would've continued the rest of summer feeling dead and isolated.

**Author's Note:**

> this was kinda short but thanks for reading
> 
> twitter: twotonques  
> tumblr: fearoftryinq


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